Share Your Goals to Boost Your Success
by Pete Bissonette
Want to learn a new skill? Write a book? Make a 6-figure income? Share your desire with a friend and you’ll be more likely to achieve it. A study by the Dominican University of California found that participants who shared their goals with friends showed more success than those who kept their goals to themselves. Clinical psychologist Gail Matthews, Ph.D., conducted the research to discover whether people who write down their goals will achieve greater success than those who do not, a finding often cited to a 1953 Yale study that never actually occurred. With the proliferation of business and personal coaching and the often-anecdotal reports of coaching success, it is important that this growing profession be founded on sound scientific research,” Matthews said.
In her study, some participants only thought about their goals and rated them based on importance and difficulty and on their own self-motivation and skill to complete them. Other participants wrote down their goals. One group shared their goals and action commitments with a friend. Another group went even further and sent weekly progress reports to a friend. At the end of the 4-week study, Matthews reported that only 43 percent of participants who kept their goals to themselves, without writing them down, accomplished them or were at least halfway there, compared with 62 percent of those who wrote their goals and shared them and 76 percent of those who shared them and sent weekly progress reports. “My study provides empirical evidence for the effectiveness of three coaching tools: accountability, commitment, and writing down one’s goals,” said Matthews, who presented her findings at the Ninth Annual International Conference of the Psychology Research Unit of Athens Institute for Education and Research.
Sharing your goals can reinforce your vision, generate feelings of excitement, and help you discover new ways to accomplish them. A good way to share is with a “Yes, and” Circle, as we explain in our new Fearlessness Paraliminal. Gather a group of three to five people you trust in a circle. Explain your goal or task with enthusiasm. Share an idea for how you can fearlessly step forward to accomplish it. Then go around the circle having each person contribute a “Yes, and…” to what you said. “Yes,” accepts the idea just spoken; “and” adds positive energy, expands the idea further, or leads to another one. For instance, let’s say you have a new product idea you want to pitch to your boss. You might begin by stating: “I will create a blueprint for the prototype for my meeting in two weeks.” A member of your circle might follow with: “Yes, and it might be good to include the market research showing demand for your product.” The next circle member might add: “Yes, and you could show how similar products of competitors are failing their customers.” Make it clear that “Yes, buts…” are not allowed. Neither are interruptions when someone is speaking. Just like brainstorming, welcome all ideas, no matter how outrageous they may seem. Make this fun, take notes, and enjoy the energy boost you get. Let it expand your thinking on the way to your success.
Our Fearlessness Paraliminal includes two sessions. The first session moves you past fears that may show up when you decide to pursue something important to you. It helps you connect firmly with the inner certainty that you are safe, loved, and fully capable of meeting whatever you experience with an easy confidence. The second session helps you set in motion the full realization of your goal with unshakeable fearlessness, trusting the inherent wisdom in you and around you to guide your way.
To learn more about Fearlessness and the other Paraliminal programs, please click here.